I’ve blogged before about my crippling paranoia. One of the things I get most paranoid about is Mr P’s ex-girlfriends. No matter how hard my friends try to get me to see sense by pointing out that, for one thing, there’s a reason why Mr P is no longer with this ladies, my paranoid remains in force.
The thing is, when I feel defensive, I put up my bitchy barriers and start picking at his ex-girlfriend’s flaws. Obviously, this isn’t a nice thing to do at all but it sure makes me feel better. However, instead of laying into them in front of Mr P and making myself seem like a petty cow (which, as you can obviously tell from this post, I’m soooo not), I thought I’d tell you, all zero readers, about them instead. This will allow me to let off some steam and hopefully provide an entertaining post as well.
Let’s start with Miss Needy. She was Mr P’s first serious girlfriend. Their courtship lasted 2 years, on and off, and was mostly spent as a long distance relationship although they also briefly lived together.
Miss Needy is the one ex who gets me really paranoid. This is due to the on/off nature of their relationship and the fact that he jeopardised his attachment to Ex-File #2 by cheating on (or at least planning to cheat on) her with Miss Needy.
I remember her as being super cool, wearing amazing clothes and having a figure to die for. Her face, my sister tell me, wasn’t all that though. Ha ha. (See? See how bitchy I can be?)
Hers and Mr P’s relationship came to a head when she moved from her home town to live with him. Her spark disappeared, she was always tired and never wanted to go out. Mr P would get home from work to find her on the sofa in her nightie having done nothing around the house. In his words, they lived “in squalor”.
Obviously, the girl had some serious issues going on and I’m not taking the piss out of depression. The bit that really gets on my nerves about her is the way she acted once she found out that Mr P was seeing someone new. I’ve already mentioned the text-flirting/cheating that wrecked his relationship with Ex-File 2.
But there’s more.
When he told her he was seeing Ex-File 3, she packed a bag and called him from the train station saying that she was coming to see him. Luckily, he put her off.
When she found out I was the new Mrs P, she burst into tears.
I just think that if she had been as attentive and bothered about him when they were actually together, she might have kept hold of him. Sisterhood is a phrase overused, usually by American talk-show hosts, but in this case I will agree with is. I can’t stand girls who mess around with other girls’ boyfriends. It’s wrong. And they should take into consideration how they would feel should the stiletto be on the other foot.
Anyway, Ex-File #1 is hopefully long gone. There was a time when she and Mr P kept in touch with texts etc. This seems to have petered out (my colossal tantrums when this happened probably aided the halting of this) so I’m hoping she’s found happiness with a nice guy and that’s she treating him better than she did Mr P.
Too wholesome? Don’t believe me?
In that case, I hope she remains a spinster and has to live in a grotty flat surrounded by thousands of cats.
There. Blog therapy: you can’t beat it.